Today is National Positive Thinking Day. But after the week we’ve had, it’s kind of hard to get into that groove.

As I was meditating on this, I realized that I don’t recognize the USA I’m living in right now. It is not the like country I grew up in and that I loved. I still love this country, but it can be a struggle to love all of my fellow citizens in the way that I want.

In the country I grew up in, we didn’t roll out a red carpet for authoritarian leaders whose troops were killing our allies’ people, even civilians and especially children. We certainly didn’t make excuses for them when they sent weapons of destruction into the airspace of one of our NATO allies.

In the country I grew up in, if someone was assassinated, we mourned. It didn’t matter if we agreed with that person or not. We felt everyone in the US should be able to express and work for their political position without being shot by some renegade with a gun. We cried and we prayed for their loved ones and hoped that the murderer would be brought to justice as soon as possible. We certainly didn’t celebrate that death, even if we opposed their political beliefs. Nor did we immediately start to blame “the other side” for that death. Unfortunately, it is all too easy for one “crazy” or radical person to get a gun and kill someone. But we were united in that shooting someone we disagree with was not an acceptable part of our political system.

In the country I grew up in, we venerated the Constitution and the system of checks and balances it set up. We believed that those checks and balances kept anyone or any branch from getting too much power. We believed it would drive our nation towards a middle path that maybe nobody would LOVE, but that the people of a diverse and complicated country could all live with.

I grew up in the DC suburbs, and lived in the heart of Washington DC (Dupont Circle) when I became a young professional right out of college. So I know the reality of politics. I know there can be animosity and dirty tricks and personal ambition and cheating and all sorts of negative things.

But in the country I grew up in, most of us, at least, believed in the decency and respectibility of our opponents. The parties would fight like the dickens for their beliefs, and one side would win and the other would lose because there were rules and we stuck to those rules. The winning side would take the losing side out for drinks, and the losers would declare, “We’ll get you next time.” The winning side was gracious and said, “Well, we’ll see.” Because neither side won all the time, and even the winning side never got all that they wanted.

So how do I resurrect that feeling at being home with my country?

In the country I grew up in, the opposing side was just “wrong.” They weren’t evil or “the enemy” or people we couldn’t respect and even be friends with even if we disagreed politically.

Because in the country I grew up in, we believed that all of us shared a love for our country, for our political system, for the Constitution, for our Democracy. And for most of us, at least during the time I was politically aware, we loved the American Dream and the American ideals in our founding documents, even if we couldn’t live up to them in the moment.

I know now that I grew up in a liberal enclave and that is not how too many of the people felt about our country. But having first hand experience in working with and living with politicians of old, I still believe that was the truth.

So how do I bring back that feeling of the USA as home? I don’t actually know the how. But I know the what is restoring love in our system. It brings to mind a couple of my favorite Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. quotes:

Oh yes, love is the way. Love is the only absolute. More and more I see this. I’ve seen too much hate to want to hate myself; hate is too great a burden to bear.
The American Dream (1965)

What is needed is a realization that power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic. Power at its best is love implementing the demands of justice, and justice at its best is power correcting everything that stands against love.
Where Do We Go from Here: Chaos or Community? (1967)

So my positive thinking for today is to keep standing for love, regardless of what shows up. Dr. King was right; the level of hatred showing up these days is too big a burden to share. I realize I have to keep loving until the country does feel like home again.

What is your intention for National Positive Thinking Day? Please share in the comments below.